The thing about being married is surely you shouldn't have to miss and crave attention, should you?
How the hell did things go so wrong?
I wish I knew, truth is it no longer matters, I no longer have a desire to fix this mess that has become my marriage.
So given that, why do I still long for a cuddle? I want affection!
Thank God for the kids, or I would just be longing for human touch. This makes me so sad.
I hate the fact we still share a bed. Contradiction I know. Damn this stupid 3 bedroom house. Nowhere to run, nowhere to hide. My children share a room, my stepson, now 19 in another room, much like his father refusing to move out!
I guess if either of us get desperate we could use each other, for affection. I don't think either of us want that, I surely don't, I hate when he touches me hate it. I am so grateful we are in bed so rarely together, he works nights, so we only have weekends together, and he comes to bed long after I have fallen asleep.
But I do want a cuddle, a hug while watching the TV, someone to stroke my back, some adult conversation from an adult who is interested in me, wants to talk t me.
How long can this go on for?
Sanity don't leave me now!
About Me
- Mummy Anon
- A woman on the edge, well not really on the edge, just feels that way sometimes. I have been on the edge before so I know I am not there anymore. Thank God I am a mother of two beautiful children, a boy and a girl. They are my world, my moon, my stars my everything I thank God everyday for the blessing in my life. A wife to a man, who I don't believe has ever loved me and if he did he certainly doesn’t anymore, However, I am very thankful I no longer love him. So that is me trapped, in a loveless marriage, trying to plan an escape route. Hoping to save the money and to find courage and strength from sharing rather than keeping it to myself.
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